Facebook does take away all the postings and such cos it's quicker to load status and pcitures. take a glimpse of what goes on in 2010.
Lesser updates in 2011 though more eventful...
snapshots into a yr's updates/memories. not bad :)
on blog, funny how I read the (only) 2010's entry, I could still feel the "rage" during that conversation with my brother and mother which seems a little silly now.
Things between us have naturally "mended". The "mother" test across Desiree and my brother clearly didn't stand a victory. I suppose they (D and bro) are still really great friends but just not couple in front of us anymore.
It was also during the time when my mother was diagnose stage 3/4 breast cancer Oct/Nov 2011, all their family trials elevated. She attributed her cancer to various things - including the glucosamine pills I gifted her sometime ago. But this mischievous cells, you never really quite know. My mum did not breastfeed any of us, I know because she urge me to take the pill to cut my milk so that my breast won't sag and cos she did so (I refuse and that is a total other story). There were frustrasted moments and one of which were when she refuse to do chemo initially. Mostly out of fear and self-fishness. Fear that she will die and "wasting" money. Selfish cos she wants all the attention and money from the daughters. She is not a good fighter mentally - she is doing great physically.
That episode was pretty much over and over the months, she managed to get her church friends to send her to hospital, accompany her to hospital, . She will be on her last dosage of chemo this friday.Afterwhich, she will go for an operation to take the lump out in a matter of weeks. My only hope is that after these ordeal, my mother will grow to be more appreciative of people around her, less vicious in the choice of words she uses. I have more or less given up on relationship with her - for she has already decided that the girls she have belongs to another family. she will only stand by her own son - no objections to that. Not just because we have gotten used to it, it's not worth fighting anymore.
last couple of weeks was CA1 and boy, there is so many updates on FB on everyone working hard with their kids. It's getting so stressful even for P2s.. my heart goes out for all the parents.
I had no idea Tasha was having exam as the notice came when I was in states. Her daddy had no clue that he is suppose to at least make some preparation for her. But oh well, Thank God for the tuition she started earlier this year. With her tiny steps towards changing her attitude on handing in homeworks and taking ownership, the wind is finally changing direction. I praise God for all the prayers heard.
It was much better than P5's CA1 where she got 50s and 60s. It's in the regions of 70s and 80s.
So this is my dilemma - I was very confident of Nathan's academic strengths at high 80s and 90 region. To apply for his DSA for NJC, HCI, DHS was a breeze - through academic. He passed the interviews and GAT with flying colours. His results then could appeal him into RI but we finally decided against it - mainly because HCI has CO and RI protrayed a stronger emphasis on sports.
Natasha has potential but her attitude slacking every now and then. I say that because she (nathan alike) never had external tuition except P6. she had 94 for Math in P4 CA2! (And she was rewarded aptly for that). But she spiral down to 65 in P5 mid year. my darling girl is really hard to guage.
She is like a miracle sometimes, she give me surprises especially when whilst teaching her, she demostrates no inclination of understanding.
So, as much as I hope for a miracle.. it's so tough to do any DSA for her!
only DHS which accepts Guzeng. Cedars, St Nicks, NYGS, SCGS - so many great girl's school but very tough to apply for her :(
I'd just leave it to God and her good hands. She has very different talents... as long as she puts her heart into doing it, she excels. The difference is, she don't persevere as well as Nathan.
On Nathan, he is driven in his own way in terms of academy. He however broke my heart and soul on mother's day when he told me that he is struggling his belief with God and wants to stop attending church.
I couldn't stop tearing. I could hear my heart cracked into pieces and then my soul was grieving so bad that I felt weary.
The greatest gift I can ever give to these two fellas are really the relationship with God. Nathan has depended alot on his own strength and he felt that his prayers didn't work. I didn't probe any further cos it doesn't make sense to drill. Let love be. I just have to continue to pray, love and trust God that all will be well.
I have to give it to him that he is decisive and non hypocrite. I did let some shady thoughts depress me - for instance on being an ill example when it's comes to bad temper - flaring lesser than before but there is no 365 of peace loving Mona. Or some months of non-reading of bible. Or Sin..
I've let that go and God teaches me every step, His guidance so loving. Definitely missing the 4some going to church but one day it will be better than that! Amen!
